The End is Near or the Countdown

So, this is where I've gone to school for the last year. New Mexico State University. And actually, on the other side of that wall behind me, is where I'm teaching right now.

Today would be the last day of school (and it was for our Magical Realism class with Robin Romm (who is an amazing teacher and writer, and who I learned a lot from both in terms of writing and reading) which had it's last class today, just over an hour ago. I still have two workshops left for fiction and one for poetry...plus I've got two more meetings with my COMP class. They're turning in their final papers and doing evals. Anyway, this semester was actually really good, and this last stretch has been crazy because we had so many people in each workshop. I have some things to say about my experiences, but I'm gonna wait till I'm completely done--not because I have anything awful to say, in fact, I have some really great things to say and a little different feels about the program and my experience. Anyway, expect that soonish.

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I'm going to miss my new friends, and a handful of the profs, who many I consider friends. I'm going to miss my 111 class from this semester. They were good sports for meeting at 7:30am!

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I turn grades in on the 11th. And we leave for Chicago on the 31st. Wow. Lots to do. But I'm sure I'll be blogging about that soon as well.

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Check this trailer out, then read about the production and the film maker. If you don't YOU WILL BURN! or I'll be upset. Cause it looks amazing for many reasons!

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There was monster of a dust storm today. Shaking our doors and windows. Like an idiot I told Em to take the car and had to walk to school in it. My eyes stung, the wind pushed against my body (40mph winds apparently), and I was covered in dust. I should've listened to Em, who said, "Hey, you should really take the car, it's gonna be nasty out there..." or something like that. But I've walked in a wind storm, and it wasn't ever this bad. I could barely make out the mountains and the horizon. Everything was dust. I mean, I've seen this kind of storm before, but I never walked in it. Birds were stalled. Boxes and branches were flying at me and cars. It was crazy.

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OK that's all for now. Tonight is pizza and TV! I can't wait for Em to get home! Neither can Indie...

Love

Joshua

Another post, just to keep things going...

This is a picture of a place called the Alibi in Humboldt County. Outside, I could smell weed coming from everywhere, and while I talked to Em on the phone, I wandered the alley. At least four people offered me a toke. I just waved them off, and mouthed, "No thanks." That night, we got a nug from someone at the show, who apparently handed this shit out to people and bands he liked. Inside, the van, we could smell it. Chad finally tucked it deep into his bag.

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The show was great, and it was crowded, and we played good. If you ever tour, play the Alibi in Arcadia, CA. They only have shows on certain days, but if you were to tour, book around playing there...if you're a small touring band. Half off on food, a shitload of free beer, tons of people, and I think a little gas money. Plus, people are pretty rad there.

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We toured a bunch with both ap and bt, and it's fun to look back and think about the places we played the people we met, and all that shit. We played with some amazing band...I'm wearing an Amestory shirt right now. It's the maroon one. I think it's Chad's, but I stole it. It's mine now.

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OK. Back to watching Deadliest Catch and hanging with Em.

Laters,

Joshua

Sorry for the delay

Man, since AWP I've been busy. I took a bunch of my work with me, but I didn't do any of it--we were having too much fun. I have to say that Denver is amazing, and AWP was great (I met some great people, and saw some old friends, and made some new friends)! The best was hanging with my old Western Pals: Ian, Kenny, and Chas. If you're reading this guys, I miss you! Oh, and best moment of the conference was when Michael Chabon said, "Favorite character from the Wire? Omar, duh!" Best word/idea taken from trip: Facepain. Best moment of hanging out: Everything... Best food: Potato Salad. best incident: Ian's fall. Best use of time: Getting free shit.

I won't be there next year, but the following year is Chicago, so come to Chicago and let's get down with it!
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I might blog a little more about that but i think that Ian's post basically said what i would say, only i didn't get elevation sickness (Las Cruces is pretty high), and I didn't get dry skin. But I will say that the 10+ hour drive was a lot better than I though it was, and while I didn't get a lot of reading done, I did have a good time. It's fun driving and watching the landscape change. I love road trips for this one fact.
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So, the cat is out of the bag. I'm moving to Chicago to attend Columbia College Chicago. The reason I'm leaving I won't go into now (I just don't feel like writing about it), but we'll just say I'm not happy where I am, and feel like CCC is the best place for me. The cat was let out by someone from Columbia (though, many people there know people here...so I should've known). I felt really bad about it, and met with some of my profs to talk about the situation. They all seemed to be excited for me, yet sad to see me go. I think people understand. I have different feelings about the program now than I did, but I know I'm making the right choice. I learned a helluva lot, and feel like my poetry has gotten a lot better. I've also started four more projects since coming here: Absolutely No God Talk (a book-length lyric essay about faith, family, and bellingham (NW)), In the Shadow of a City (a novel where the main character is the city, and it follows the desruction of it, through shifting POVs that never stay with one person--there's a slime that's spreading all over the city), and This is the Way to Rule (a post-apocolyptic collection of poems, structured as a "behind the scenes documentary), and a collection of poems about the NW, SW, and MW...i'll be working on this for the next few years). Good stuff. Though, now, I want to focus on these, really closely, and I want to focus on poetry only (writing fiction in my free time...yeah, like I'll have any of that, good thing I'm done with the Story Thief).
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The most important part of this blog is that I'M GOING TO BE A FATHER! I don't know how to do that, but I have to learn, 'cause the baby's coming in October. Wow. It's crazy. i have so much to say, but I don't know how to say it. I think it's a boy, Em thinks it's a girl. We'll say. If you start a pool, I get half of the winnings! You know, for baby food and diapers!
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Listening: Jenny Lewis Solo and Broken Social Scene
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Watching: The Wire, Pysch, Fringe (new episodes!)
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Reading: Abraham Smith - Whim Man Mammon
Kelly Link - "Lull" a short story (so good)
DH Lawrence - Selected
Lisa Fishman - Dear, Read
Howl - Allen Ginsberg (never read this, DAMN, so good!)
Ian's stories with comments to come (don't worry Ian, just now I'm catching up...expect notes by the end of the week! i'm excited. I looked at them once, but I'm going back again...they're cool...i liked the revisions...end transmission)
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I have more posts to talk about, but I'll get to that later. Sorry for the wait. It won't happen again.
Love
joshua

Don't worry...

...I'm gonna blog soon. I got a lot to talk about. AWP. Denver. My Friends. My stuff. My dog. Emily. My TV. My lack of film watching. My class. My pictures. Music.

Stay tuned,

J to the Osh

Wendy and Lucy

If you haven't seen this film, see it. It's beautiful and minimal, and I couldn't stop watching. Sure, it's a slow moving film, but the tension that rises from each moment accumulates. It's a simple film, and while I don't want to SPOIL anything, let's just say I'm not a "fan" of the way it ends, but cinematically, that was the only way for it to end. It just made sense, but it broke my heart.

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First of all, the cinematography was really crisp and simple, but it had this warmth and subtly to it that really kept the frame undisturbed. Michelle Williams is also very BOMB. And I don't just say that cause I think she's really pretty and super cute, but because this girl can act! Brokeback Mountain is just a glimpse of what she can do (and that was fucking mind-blowing!). Now the director is a Northwest Gal, and her last two films were shot in and around Portland. Nothing like a good NW film. But, she doesn't choose to make these films be landmarked and labeled, she keeps the camera's frame focused on the immediacy of each moment, only allowing glimpses of the little worlds of the Northwest. Yeah, it's clearly NW, but the film isn't swallowed by the landscape, but rather exists within it. It becomes part of the frame. It's invisible, yet it informs. OK, enough of that. Just go rent it. If you have netflix you can watch it instantly.

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I just wrote a poem about my Seattle of the 90s. I just kept thinking about how I was unaware of the Nirvanas and Soundgardens and Pearl Jams till they were coming to me through the TV. All the while, just minutes from my stomping ground, these bands were playing clubs and houses, and I was just getting ready for baseball games, or something.

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OK, back to writing and watching TV.

Peace out,

Joshua

Bellingham

Hey, I'm sure you Bellingham folk recognize this. Bellingham Bay. This area has its hands on many things in my past, from shooting films with Chris Koser, sneaking into the derelict buildings and properties for two or three shots (I remember one time Chris made me walk down the center of Holly, before a bunch of cars past--he was making a post-apocalyptic short film. I went, "Dude, I don't want to get hit." And went, "Don't worry, I'll tell you if they're gonna hit you," but of course, he was watching the scene, and we got a few honks before we ran from the road...near miss). Before we started dating, Emily and I used to walk everywhere. We really didn't have anywhere we could hang out, so we walked. Many of our walks stopped here, just right of the picture.

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I'm headed to Denver next week for AWP. It's gonna be good times. I'm excited to see my friends and check out all the panels and writers and all presses and journals. And of course, Chabon. I think my Dad's sending his new book to me, so I can get it signed, or something. I'm riding with some fellow MFA from NMSU. 10+ hours. Good times. I'll probably be reading and tightening up dialogue and small fixes on the Story Thief. Which reminds me, if you want the new draft, lemme know. I could use all the eyes/brains I could for the final draft I work before I start sending it out. I got a feeling that next year is just gonna be too busy to really focus on it, so I will have spring and summer to get it out.

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So, there's been a lot of workshop talk lately, but I've taken a break from writing about it. But I thought I would mention something. My friend said, "The workshop has become a parody of itself, a joke." He hates it. Like really hates it. I think there's still some good in the workshop, but we just have to wade through the bullshit. I think it's gotten better.

During the workshop of this fantastic little story, people were making a big deal out of a little things (the first line said, "So and So hadn't set foot on a diamond in years..." And a couple people said, that it made the story seem like it was gonna be about finding diamonds. I yelled, "REALLY? COME ON!" And said, people who talk/know about baseball, really aren't gonna have to say "baseball diamond." And besides it's a picky thing to bring up, considering the second half of the sentence says something about fans. The following two paragraphs talk about an old baseball player" Fucking idiots!), but what was happening was that the story was really good, and only really need a tiny unpack-job and some reorganization. It was working. One guy said, "This feels like a fourth or fifth draft." Tee prof (who is starting to realize the guy who said this is kind of a douche, idiot, who only harms the workshop) goes, "I don't know what you mean, is that good or bad?" The guys goes, "Well, it's good, but it's only a fourth or fifth draft, it needs some cleaning up. I mean, it's not quite good yet." The professor said, "Does it really make a difference what draft it is," then the guy goes, "well most stories turned in here were messy, and obviously not a fourth or fifth draft. I think after a few more, this could be ready." Later in class, we found out that the guy who wrote the story wrote it two weeks ago (which according to his friends, means he wrote it a week ago and this is his first draft...HA...awesome!) Anyway, I've come to realize that there are people who SUCK, and your job, in keep your writing community solid and positive and beneficial is to move past what these kinds of people say, and to not even comment, don't give them the satisfaction of dignifying a response. That's all they want, I think.

We work-shopped three stories, and I, at first, was miserable. I had given up, but people started talking about stupid shit, so after twenty minutes I finally spoke up, and kept at it. I disagreed with the prof on almost everything and at one point, the prof said, "I can't think of a book that does this successfully. I said, "Excuse me, but to tell a writer that they can't do something, because you can't think of a book that did what they're trying to do well, is ridiculous and wrong." He nodded and said, "yeah that's just an opinion." After class he came up to me and said, "I want you in every class I teach. You call me out on my bullshit. And that's what we need. When you say stuff, it always makes me question what I'm thinking, even if I think you're wrong, sometimes, I end up changing my mind, or at least thinking about what you said."

It was a little justice. It felt good. He kept laughing during the workshop and saying, "Josh you're funny." I thought he was teasing me, but apparently, he was stoked about how pissed and agitated I was getting at the misreadings and responses. I told him I studied with Kate Trueblood, who said, "Just cause I'm your professor, doesn't mean I can't be wrong. It doesn't mean what I said is stone. Read the work closely and make your points. Prove me wrong if I'm wrong. I'm not God. You're here for the community, not to agree with me."

Thank you, Kate.

Anyway, I thought I'd share that.

Ian, feel better, and I'll see you next week.

Matt and Chelsea, have fun in that castle.

Dave, yeah I became a fan of NW Hardcore! WHAT?!

Emily, don't make fun of me, and I love you.

And anyone else who reads, thanks.

OK. Enough of that,

Peace out,

J to the Izza